Top Trumps Goes Green

High octane card games goes gay

Just when you thought the world couldn’t get any more stupid, along comes some beardy environmentalist twat who turns Top Trumps green.

Yep, forget the days of outdoing your mate with an 800bhp V6, as now it’s all about emissions and who can drive like a big fucking flowery shirt wearing girl.

Honestly, what a crock of shit, have they gone insane?

So it’s goodbye Porsche, Ferrari and hello Toyota Prius, hybrids and electric motors. How boring.

Now the cars will score on features such as low CO2 emissions, fuel efficiency and large boot space that can be filled with horse shit, well probably.

The new version has been developed by climate change charity Marches Energy Agency in association with Winning Moves, the Top Trumps company and will be available on eBay.